And still I continue on, fighting valiantly in my crusade against the evil that is monkey.  I am not done fuming that it was MONKEYS that caused most of my blog hits yesterday.  Come on, Hitman Monkey got 60 views!  And today he already has 16!!!  GAAAHH!  What monkey business is this?  There are a LOT more interesting things on this site!  Try this lovely post about the platypus. 

As many of you know, I still bear the deep emotional scars caused by my childhood run in with one  at a theme park.  Those fateful words still ring in my ears, “Kids, come shake the monkey’s hand!”  Well, I offered him my hand, reaching out full of childish wonder and trust and innocence, and how did he greet that hand of friendship?  With the sharp little evil monkey teeth of death!!!!!  Oh, and by the way, another reason I am mad is that I didn’t get ANYTHING for my trouble.  I should have gotten free membership to that theme park for LIFE, man!  Or at the very least free dinner!  All they did was pay for my tetanus shot.  Gee thanks, another flesh wound. 

So here I sit, still bearing those wounds, so damaged and tortured am I that I had to share my pain.  Truthfully, I am so conditioned against small furry animals I can barely watch this video that I accidentally found on YouTube.   Seriously.  My heart starts pounding out of my chest and I break out into a cold sweat.  And it aint even a monkey!  Just a “dramatic lemur”…who I think wants to have me for lunch.

I think I will just have to stick with Dramatic Chipmunk (even if he is a prarie dog).  It’s all the monkey’s fault.